Film: Russell Crowe as "Noah"

There’s nothing like a cheesy “Jesus” movie to diminish your childhood imagination of Bible stories, until… you hear that Russell Crowe is starring as Noah in a film adaption of the biblical epic.

Yes, Russell Crowe is set to play Noah under the direction of Darren Aronofsky, truly to be a story hour (even 2 hopefully) of gigantic proportions. Director Darren Aronofsky was last known for his Academy Award winning film The Black Swan - a far cry away from a Bible story. And Noah, no doubt, is far cry from what most of fans would anticipate for Aronofsky’s next project. While some of his cult-followers, from previous the films like Requiem for a Dream and Pi, may be disappointed by this seemingly safe and reserved choice of a film, this is certain not to be some kind of cardboard box Noah’s Ark reenactment you may have seen in Sunday school.

Aronosky, using his twitter a board for updates and peeks into the film-making process, has been waiting on this project for sometime. "I dreamt about this since I was 13. And now it’s a reality. Genesis 6:14 #noah,” sounds like a movie that’s been in his mind for a while, one likely to rock the boat of versions we’ve read from illustrated books as kids. His tweet refers to when God told Noah to “Make thee an ark of gopher wood, rooms shalt thou make in the ark, and shalt pitch it within and without with pitch" and make thee an ark, Darren did, or still is. Located in Oyster Bay N.Y., the foundations of the film’s own ark had been set up weeks ago. Though the filming began in Iceland with the crew, including previous choice cast members such as Jennifer Connelly and famous faces like Emma Watson (sure to draw a crowd all on it’s own,) it’s final three weeks that were brought to Brooklyn New York were interrupted by Storm Sandy. 

Literally Sandy took the production by surprise, and washed out Noah’s ark, or at least did some serious damage, presenting the cast with more of a method approach their performance than they bargained for. Emma Watson, also keeping fans up to date through twitter, posted after the storm “I take it that the irony of a massive storm holding up the production of Noah is not lost.” But hold your breath audiences. We will not be able to see Noah and his ark until 2014.

Surely with Aronosky directing this story one can’t predict what to expect. Truth be told (and no pun intended), caution parents, this will likely not be the storybook bible version to send the kiddies off to bed with. Yes, revisiting the original story, Noah’s situation was about as much a civil disaster as it was a natural disaster.  An R rating would not be surprising. But, then again, unlike the common presumption, who ever said the Bible was a clean, family, feel-good story?